In an exciting new development, the neurotech firm Cogitat is working on building a groundbreaking system that translates brain activity into actual actions. But what kind of actions, you may ask? Well, we have some inside information that will definitely make you laugh.
Sources report that Cogitat has been testing their system on a group of individuals, all given fake names to protect their identities. Let’s take a closer look at some of the hilarious scenarios that have supposedly taken place during these trials:
– Veronica was hooked up to the system and asked to think about dancing. Suddenly, she started doing the robot…in the middle of a crowded street. Passersby were completely baffled by this seemingly random display of dance moves.
– Meanwhile, Greg was asked to think about singing. Unfortunately, he wasn’t a very good singer to begin with, and the system didn’t do him any favors. He belted out a particularly off-key rendition of “I Will Always Love You” in the middle of a restaurant, causing several people to cover their ears and run for the exits.
– The system also appears to have some quirks that could be considered…less than useful. For example, when Emily was asked to think about painting a picture, her arms suddenly flailed all over the place, knocking over paintbrushes and sending paint flying everywhere. Needless to say, she didn’t end up with anything resembling a picture by the end of the session.
– And finally, we have to talk about poor Derek. During his trial, he was asked to think about running. Unfortunately, the system apparently misinterpreted his brainwaves and made him run…straight into a wall. We’re told he’s recovering well, but maybe they should put some safety measures in place before the next session!
All in all, it sounds like Cogitat has a long way to go before their system is truly effective. But hey, at least they’re giving us all a good laugh in the meantime!
