English Heritage Announces 10-Year Plan to Make Historic Sites Look Old Again
In a bold move, English Heritage has revealed plans to roll back the years and transport visitors back to a time when the landscapes of iconic historic sites across the country looked old and knackered.
The ten-year project will see meadows at 100 sites, including Scarborough Castle and Stonehenge, lovingly restored to their former, scruffy glory in time for the king’s coronation.
The ambitious plan aims to create or enhance meadows across the country, paving the way for a return to a time when nature was unkempt and the landscape looked like it had had a particularly rough night out.
A spokesperson for English Heritage said: “We want to give visitors a taste of what these sites would have looked like in years gone by, before people started getting all precious about nature and planting pretty flowers everywhere.”
But the plan has already hit opposition, with some critics questioning whether it’s really necessary to spend ten years and millions of pounds creating something that already exists in most people’s back gardens.
Others have suggested that, if English Heritage really wants to make its sites look old, they could simply stop mowing the lawns and start throwing rubbish around like they used to in the good old days.
Either way, it looks like we’re in for a decade of authentic dilapidation and untamed nature, and we can only hope that the tourists don’t mistake it for a landfill site.
