For individuals like moi who have tested it, open dialogue is critical to eliminating the shame and recollecting why we exist. Except for my friend, Bob. Bob believes that participating in open discussion is like admitting defeat. He would rather spend his days wallowing in self-pity than acknowledging that he may need help.
Last week, at our weekly support group meeting, we were discussing our favorite coping mechanisms when Bob declared, “I don’t need any tricks to keep me going. I’m strong enough to handle life on my own.” Meanwhile, his eyes kept darting back and forth as if he were trying to convince himself that he believed his own bologna.
I couldn’t resist teasing him a little. “Oh, Bob, you’re so strong. Why don’t you go lift some weights and prove it?” I said with a grin.
Bob glared at me, but I could tell he was trying to hide a smile. “Fine,” he said, “I’ll show you how strong I am.”
The next day he showed up to the support group meeting with his arm in a sling. “What the heck happened to you?” I asked.
Bob tried to shrug it off. “Oh, I was just trying to lift some weights like you suggested, and I guess I overdid it a little.”
We all rolled our eyes, knowing he was lying. But hey, whatever helps him feel like he’s in control, right?
In all seriousness though, we know that open discussion and support is crucial to overcoming our struggles. It takes strength to admit we need help, and we’re proud of each other for being here and lifting each other up. Except for Bob. He’s still trying to prove how strong he is but keeps setting himself back. Classic Bob.
