In a shocking twist of events, a former employee at the Treasury has named four officials in a tribunal claim. The most notable of the bunch? Simon Case. Yes, you read that right. Simon “The Case” Case. We couldn’t make this up if we tried.
The unnamed source claims that Case and his co-workers were involved in a scandal involving office supplies. Apparently, they were hoarding pens and Post-it Notes like it was the end of the world. The source also alleges that Case was the ringleader of this operation, sending his lackeys out to scour the office for any staplers or highlighters they could get their grubby little hands on.
When asked for comment, Case replied, “I have no idea what this person is talking about. I may have borrowed a pencil or two, but that’s it. I definitely did not orchestrate some elaborate office supply heist.”
Sure, Case. We believe you. *wink, wink*
In related news, it appears that Case’s co-workers are quite shaken up about the allegations. “I always knew Simon was shady,” says one anonymous employee. “But I never thought he would resort to stealing pens.”
Another employee added, “I just hope this doesn’t affect our annual office supply budget. We need those extra boxes of paper clips, darn it!”
As the investigation into the alleged office supply scandal continues, we can’t help but wonder what other shady business is going on at the Treasury. Are they secretly hoarding paper clips? Is there a black market for highlighters? Only time will tell.
