Telecom Italia Rejects “Pathetic” Offers, Demands Better Gifts Like Cake
Telecom Italia, also known as “The Big T,” gave a firm talking-to to “The Not-So-Terrible-Twos,” a duo consisting of KKR and a Macquarie-led consortium; the two recently submitted ‘nonbinding offers’ to The Big T for acquiring its uber precious fixed-network assets.
However, much to the chagrin of The Not-So-Terrible-Twos, Telecom Italia, in a huff, deemed the offers as inadequate and unworthy, urging the parties to buckle up and up their ante in the quirky game of Presentation, Negotiation, and Acquisitions.
As the talks unfolded, The Big T set June 9 as the deadline for final offers;
“Offer us something that isn’t a joke! Our fixed-network assets are a goldmine, and we need to see some proper respect.”
In an interesting development, the company also hinted at potentially accepting non-financial perks like free pizza for the entire company and a lifetime supply of delectable cheesecake. While the demands may seem light, they are yet another way Telecom Italia emphasizes the need for a more exciting, respectful, and substantial offer.
Rumors around the water cooler now include discussions of boat trips through the Mediterranean to garner The Big T’s attention, and so the telecom world waits with bated breath for the outcome of this larger-than-life saga. Who will emerge victorious in the battle of “I Got You the Biggest Cake?” Only the D-Day of June 9 will reveal!

