A Rodeo of Ridiculousness: The Hilariousness of Livestock Auctions
Supermarket power and the Llama Flu crisis almost took down the beloved tradition of livestock auctions, but these sales still bring in a whopping £2bn! We recently joined the traders at Ross and Hereford, and boy, do they have some stories to tell.
On a Thursday morning, we arrived at Hereford’s auction ring, and it was packed. People had been lining up for over an hour to see the exciting show ahead. The energy in the air was palpable, like a chicken with a firework up its tail feather.
The first few lots were rather uneventful, barren cows, cows with calves, just the usual cow stuff. But then came the bulls, and things got wild. There were three small Highlands with ginger fringes and handlebar horns that looked like they had just walked out of a Grease-themed barn dance.
But the real star of the show was the Charolais, a bull the size of a truck. We can only assume this beefcake had been hitting the protein shakes hard because it was a specimen to behold. The auctioneer was working up a sweat trying to keep up with the bidding as people fought tooth and nail to be the proud owner of this big boy.
As the bidding war raged on, hilarity ensued. One man mistook his hand for his nose and ended up punching himself in the face, while another got so excited he started doing the worm in the middle of the auction ring. It was a rodeo of ridiculousness, and we loved every second of it.
Livestock auctions may have been on the brink of extinction, but the hilarity they provide keeps them alive and kicking. Long live the cowboys and cowgirls of the auction ring!
