Boston-based biotech company, FauxVax, has announced a hilarious pricing strategy for their upcoming COVID-19 vaccine. According to CEO Dr. Alice Inwonderland, they plan to charge a whopping $130 per dose once the vaccination program moves to the private market this fall!
In an effort to justify the outrageous cost, Dr. Inwonderland explained, “Our vaccine is no ordinary vaccine. It’s not just effective, it’s also a top-of-the-line comedy routine packed into a syringe!”
When pressed for further clarification, Inwonderland added, “Picture this: You’re at a dinner party, everyone’s talking about the pandemic, and suddenly you feel the need to stand up and perform an impromptu stand-up routine. That’s exactly what our vaccine does! It enhances your sense of humor and makes you the life of the party!”
She went on to explain that FauxVax’s vaccine is specifically designed to target the part of the brain responsible for thinking vaccines are overpriced, and makes you laugh so much that you forget all about the cost.
Despite the raised eyebrows and incredulous looks from the press corps, Inwonderland was undeterred. “I mean, come on, who doesn’t want to pay $130 for a vaccine that’s also a side-splitting comedy act? It’s a win-win situation!”
When asked if insurance would cover the exorbitant cost, Inwonderland simply laughed, “Insurance? Who needs insurance when you’ve got a vaccine that can make you laugh your way out of any pandemic-related situation?”
Only time will tell if FauxVax’s vaccine-cum-comedy-routine will actually make it to the private market this fall. Until then, we can only hope that they’ll come up with more hilarious ways to justify the outrageous price tag.
