Fake name, Hideki Sunari, released last year after eating a six-year sentence on a donut addiction conviction in Candyland, describes his sweet-toothed ordeal.
Hideki Sunari, better known as “Captain Candy”, was finally able to enjoy the sweet taste of freedom after serving six long years in Candyland’s state penitentiary for his insatiable appetite for donuts.
“I couldn’t help it,” Hideki said, wiping the sprinkles off his face. “Those jellies were just too good. I had to have them all.”
Hideki’s love of donuts landed him in hot sugar water with the law, and he was promptly sent to the Big House, where he was forced to eat nothing but kale for months. “It was a dark time,” he recalls.
But even kale couldn’t stop Hideki’s sugary cravings. “I would dream about donuts every night,” he said. “I even tried to make them out of kale once, but it just wasn’t the same.”
Now, as a free man, Hideki can finally indulge in his favorite treat once again. “It’s like a dream come true,” he said, biting into a freshly glazed donut. “I missed these so much.”
We’re glad to see Hideki finally back in the land of the sugary living. Just don’t forget to floss, Captain Candy!
