In a bold move, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) is set to propose the most stringent tailpipe-emissions standards yet. The new regulations would force auto manufacturers to shift their focus towards electric vehicles, which experts predict will result in a major boon to the electric vehicle market.
As expected, car companies were up in arms about the new proposal. “It’s ridiculous!” exclaimed Bill Ford, CEO of Blue Oval Motors. “We’ve been making cars with tailpipes for over 100 years. You can’t just tell us to stop. It’s like taking away a baby’s bottle!”
But the EPA stood by its decision, citing the overwhelming evidence that fossil fuels are a major culprit in air pollution and global warming. “We have a responsibility to protect the environment for future generations. It’s time to put our foot down and demand change from the industry,” said EPA Administrator Jack Green.
Of course, not everyone was upset about the news. In fact, one group was over the moon: the electric car manufacturers. “This is fantastic news for us,” said Elon Mustard, CEO of Tesbolt. “Finally, we’ll be able to level the playing field with the big guys.”
Meanwhile, the gas-powered car companies were scrambling to come up with a response. Jerry Chrysler, CEO of Red Ram, revealed that they were working on a new technology that would allow their cars to run on rainbows and sunshine. “We’re almost there,” he said optimistically.
In the end, the new tailpipe-emissions standards were a win for the environment and for electric car enthusiasts everywhere. As for the gas-loving car companies, they’ll just have to find a new way to play the game – and maybe invest in some skates.
