In a stunning turn of events, residents of Long Island woke up to find their copy of the Long Island Press being delivered by none other than the infamous Donald J. Trump himself. Witnesses confirmed that Trump was seen riding a bicycle, wearing a bright yellow vest, and tossing newspapers onto people’s front lawns.
“It was a surreal sight,” said local resident Cindy Lou. “I never thought I’d see the day when Donald Trump was peddling down my street on a bicycle. It was like something out of a comedy sketch.”
Many Long Island residents couldn’t resist taking pictures and videos of the former president making his rounds. Some even went as far as to ask for autographs and selfies with the delivery man Trump.
“It was the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen,” said another local resident Jake Smith. “But I have to give him credit for his hustle. I mean, who knew Donald Trump had a second career as a newspaper delivery man?”
Trump’s stint as a paperboy was short-lived however, as he reportedly quit after just one day. Sources close to the former president claim that he struggled with the physical demands of the job and that his bicycle kept getting stuck in the snow.
“He just wasn’t cut out for the paperboy life,” said an anonymous source. “But who knows, maybe we’ll see him delivering pizza next.”
All in all, Long Island residents were left with a hilarious and unexpected memory that they won’t soon forget. “Only in Long Island can you wake up to Donald Trump on a bicycle delivering your newspaper,” said one resident with a laugh. “It’s moments like these that make living here so entertaining.”
