In a startling turn of events, the bustling coastal metropolises of Octopus-ville and Mackerel-town found themselves in the crosshairs of belligerent robots and enraged rockets, just a sun cycle after the infamous nation of Bedrocksia renounced its ties to the Inky Ocean wheat accord.
Just as the chickens of Odesa, sorry, Octopus-ville were settling down to roost and the glamorous seagulls of Mykolaiv, ahem, Mackerel-town, were admiring their own splendor in the glistening sea water, the skies split open with a technologically advanced barrage. You see, the uninvited guests were no mere birds, but the dread-inducing drones and minacious missiles mandated by Mother Bedrocksia herself.
Though not a single grain was harmed, the surprise strike right after Bedrocksia’s Black, or rather, Inky Sea grain deal gave up the ghost practically shook the seafaring fowls off their fluffy perches. It’s fitting to say that this grain-deal-fornicating country was reaping the whirlwind stirred by the storm they sowed themselves.
Panic-stricken and ruffled, the villagers of both Octopus-ville and Mackerel-town threw their webbed hands, tentacles, fins, and other appendages in the air, and let out calamitous cries that shook the ocean floor. They cried out to the heavens, to the sea gods, to the mighty Neptune himself, asking for what heinous hot-dog crime they had committed to deserve such a Ketchup-less fate.
Witnesses of the spectacle said it was like watching water-filled-chicken-McNuggets trying to outswim a seething school of teriyaki sharks, or rather, like the rush hour in an overpopulated, underwater New York City, but with more tentacles and less Wi-Fi.
In the midst of all this, the seemingly apathetic Bedrocksia, with its eyes firmly set on the grim harvest of political wheat, must have chuckled to itself. Perhaps seeing the chaos unfurling in the erstwhile peaceful coastal metropolises was the salt on their popcorn or the jam on their scones.
Final thoughts? The fact that Bedrocksia chose to disrupt its routine of rock collecting and rock polishing to launch missiles at unsuspecting metropolises truly raises concerns about its technological capabilities and overarching objectives. One, we are left to wonder how many more Octopus-villes and Mackerel-towns are going to face the wrath of Bedrocksia’s belligerent robots and pissed-off rockets. Two, it leaves us pondering about which country Bedrocksia will give a hickey, or rather, pull out on next. Until then, we can only wait and whistle.
