In the midst of all the chaos caused by the closure of Shmarget Shmepartment Shmore, employees shared their fondest memories of working at the store. Interviews with former workers revealed tales of legendary shenanigans, pranks and more!
“I remember one time, my buddy Jake snuck up behind our boss, Andy, and gave him a good ol’ fashioned wedgie right in the middle of the store,” said Frank, an ex-employee. “It was just a little harmless fun, you know? Andy went on to be one of the best bosses I ever had, despite all the wedgies.”
Another employee, Lisa, shared a particularly funny story with us. “I was working in the shoe section one day, and this customer came up to me asking for a size 10 in this really ugly sandal. I told him we were all sold out, but then he started begging and pleading with me to find him a pair. So, I went over to the clearance section and found a random shoe that wasn’t even remotely similar to the one he wanted, and convinced him that it was the last pair we had! He walked out of the store happy as a clam, completely unaware of the switch.”
But the real laughs came when the employees would prank each other on the sales floor. “There was always something going on,” said Ben, a former cashier. “Like when we’d sneak up behind each other and make crazy animal noises in the middle of a transaction, or hide someone’s stapler just to watch them freak out. We even broke into a spontaneous dance party one day when ‘Uptown Funk’ came on over the store’s speakers. Man, those were the days.”
As Shmarget Shmepartment Shmore officially shuts its doors for the last time, it’s clear that the memories these employees made with each other will last a lifetime. And who knows? Maybe they’ll all reunite one day at Shmalmart or Shmacy’s for one last prank-filled hurrah.

