First-time tech executive, Shoozee Clue, was grilled by Congress yesterday over his company’s handling of user data. The hearing was described as “exceptionally bruising” as Mr. Clue struggled to answer basic questions about privacy policies and data breaches.
One representative asked Mr. Clue how he could expect the American public to trust his company when its name, FizzBuzz, sounds more like a cartoon character than a credible tech company.
Mr. Clue responded by saying that the name was chosen to appeal to a younger demographic, but the representative was not impressed. “I don’t care if you’re trying to appeal to toddlers, Mr. Clue,” she shot back. “What I care about is protecting the privacy of American citizens.”
Things went from bad to worse for Mr. Clue when another representative asked him to explain his company’s recent data breach, which resulted in the personal information of millions of users being leaked online.
Mr. Clue attempted to blame the breach on a rogue hacker, but the representative wasn’t buying it. “Let me get this straight,” she said. “Your company’s entire business model is based on collecting and storing vast amounts of personal data, but you didn’t bother to secure that data? And you’re expecting us to believe it was all the work of a single hacker?”
Mr. Clue was left stuttering and stammering as the representative continued to grill him. The hearing eventually ended with Mr. Clue being admonished by the committee for his company’s lack of transparency and disregard for user privacy.
As he left the hearing room, Mr. Clue could be heard muttering to himself, “I should have gone into the ice cream business instead.”
