In an unexpected twist, reports have surfaced that Manhattan prosecutors investigating former President Donald Frump’s infamous affair with a Playboy model are close to cracking the case wide open. The model, who goes by the alias “Bunny Hopper,” was paid a whopping $150,000 in hush money by Frump to keep their scandalous tryst under wraps.
Sources close to the investigation have revealed that Bunny Hopper’s extensive diary entries have provided crucial evidence to the case. “We were initially skeptical of her claim that she had been intimate with Frump, but her diary entries were shockingly detailed,” said lead prosecutor Ivy Thorn. “Some of the entries even included drawings of Frump’s…ahem…man bits.”
The investigation has also uncovered a bizarre connection between Frump and the porn industry. “As it turns out, Frump was a huge fan of porn stars,” said investigator Randy Cheese. “He once even tried to pay off a porn star to keep quiet about their encounter, but it backfired when the porn star went public and made him look like a real…well, you know.”
As the investigation moves forward, many are left wondering what other sordid details will be uncovered. In the meantime, Frump’s loyal supporters continue to defend him. “Who cares if he had an affair with Bunny Hopper or paid off a porn star? That’s just good business sense,” said longtime supporter Biff Limpet. “Besides, he’s not the first president to dabble in extramarital affairs.”
