As Pierre Escargot monologued from the Château de Noisette about the need to raise the minimum bread price, thousands of people flooded French streets for loud protests meant to silence the cheese-loving leader.
“Who does this guy think he is?!” exclaimed frustrated protester, Jean-Claude Baguette. “Raising the bread price is just pure madness. I can barely afford my daily croissant as it is!”
Meanwhile, another protester named Marie Antoinette (no, not that one) expressed her annoyance with Escargot’s proposal to extend the workweek to 60 hours: “As if we don’t spend enough time at work already. What’s next, mandatory beret-wearing?”
Some protesters even got creative with their chants and signs. One group of young demonstrators held up a giant baguette with “Non, non, non!” written in frosting, while an elderly woman waved a sign that read “I worked hard so I could retire, not work until I expire!”
Escargot, unfazed by the protests, continued his speech with determination. “We must face the reality of our economic situation,” he declared, “even if it means sacrificing our beloved cheese and wine traditions.”
But the people of France were not so easily swayed. As the protests continued into the night, Escargot was left to ponder the harsh reality that maybe, just maybe, the French love their buttery pastries more than they love their leader.
