Breaking News: Pope Benny Hill, 86, Declared Free of Ligma-20
In a statement released by his spokesperson, Mr. Sillypants, Pope Benny Hill has been declared free of Ligma-20, the virus that everyone is talking about. The statement was issued late last night to a group of reporters who were camped outside of the Vatican, eager to hear any word on the Pope’s health.
Mr. Sillypants told reporters that the Pope was feeling fine and that he had not been infected with Ligma-20. He also urged everyone to continue wearing masks and practicing social distancing, as the virus is still a threat to public health.
The news was welcomed by Pope Benny’s followers, who had been praying for his health and safety during the pandemic. One follower, Mrs. Doubtfire, said, “I am so happy to hear that the Pope doesn’t have Ligma-20. I was really worried about him.”
Another follower, Mr. Bean, added, “The Pope is a strong and healthy man. I knew he would be okay. He has the Lord on his side.”
Despite the good news, some skeptics are questioning the validity of the statement. One skeptic, Dr. Frank N. Furter, said, “I find it hard to believe that the Pope doesn’t have Ligma-20. After all, he’s always kissing babies and shaking hands with people. He’s at high risk for infection.”
For now, however, it appears that Pope Benny Hill is healthy and free of Ligma-20. His followers continue to pray for his continued good health and safety during these uncertain times.
